Monday, 20 April 2009

Day 209

Feeling a bit crapsoes due to headache/hot flushes/sickyfeeling.
Didn't have a brilliant music, and now am just wondering whether to stop feeling sorry for myself and get on with the shit I need to it is that or say "tomorrow, I'll do it tomorrow".  I know I won't.  Well the chances are I won't; even though Jack'll have to go early cos of busses - assuming he's round for a bit of course - thus will be basically incommunicado for an hour or whatever it is.  I have a lot of art to do, music to finish, and French and Spanish to learn...and shit.
And there's philosophy work to do.

I just feel like I wanna run.  Get away from whatever it is that's keeping me down and break free of whatever mental barrier I'm putting up for myself.  It's a stupid thing to do because I wouldn't run even if it wasn't dark outside and I know that all I want to do is not be here with these people.
I don't give a damn about fishing. Why's it on the TV?

I just ranted to Jack about stuff I'm not going to put online, and he said "Everything does happen for a reason."
That's the way I think...I just completely forgot it.  Everything does happen for a reason.  If it wasn't for shit happening the way it has, nothing would be like now.  One of the more significant bad parts of Jack's life is the reason we are where we are's a weird thought, but it's true.
Everything happens for a reason.

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